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>If you find yourself feeling anxious in any situation, immediately switch to positive, loving, forgiving, generous thoughts about the people and things around you.

Hi Michael,

That doesn't always work for me. Sometimes, what helps me is to do exactly the opposite. I allow myself to fully explore the anger I'm feeling. After all, there are good reasons for those feelings, and usually they extend deep into my past.

I even have a sound-proof padded room in a shed in my yard where I can go to yell, curse, kick, and pound when anger seems to completely obscure my view of reality.

On occasion, that leads to a good, deep cry. Letting myself fully experience the negativity, rather than brushing it aside as a mistake or character flaw, helps to "clear the air" and allows the good, positive, feelings to return in their own way.

To change the subject entirely, I was thinking about you earlier because I'm reading a book I think you'd really like. It's called Extraordinary Knowing. It's written by a psychoanalyst who had an anomalous experience that forced her to completely change her world-view.

The forward says: "Scientific investigation of ESP fails because the experiment necessarily excludes the human emotions that make ESP possible." (I'm smiling. Back to emotions again.)

Later she says: "If we're going to study the real data, we'll have to apply some version of the scientific method to the data where they really live and as they really are. We'll need to take on the daunting, even unnerving task of systematically investigating singular, subjective, profoundly personal experience."

Kinda like I Thess. 5:18, "In everything give thanks", huh? ;)
When I lost my son, I can't even count how many people told me it's okay to be angry with God, he's big, he can take it. I never could understand why anyone would think I would be mad at God. I certainly wasn't happy that my son was taken sooner than I wanted but he was never *mine* to begin with. I'm grateful, and yes thankful that God shared my son with me for the 15 years he was here and that he's safe Home now and I'll see him again. I still grieve and always will but above all I'm thankful.

The main reason "why we are here" is to experience separation. It teaches the soul what it means and how it feels to be a separate, unique, individual, something that may be very difficult if not impossible in the Spiritual Universe due to the overwhelming feelings of oneness and connectedness, or it's "holographic nature." From the moment we are born and we experience separation from our mothers, to the moment we die, and our loved ones experience profound separation by our passing, life is a never ending lesson in separation. It's not just separation from people either. It's also separation from things, pick a grape or a tomato and you experience separation, even when we go the bathroom, life is a never ending lesson about separation. Why? Because in a hologram, nothing is truly separate from antyhing else. It has to be learned, and it has to be experienced to be truly understood. The short time we spend on this earth experiencing separation has to be enough to last for eternity. The more emotional the experience the more powerful and long lasting the memories it creates. This life is a lesson in overcoming the holographic qualities of the other side. We are here to experience duailty and separation, time and space, and make memories of what it's like to live in a 3D + 1T universe.
"I was part of all that has occurred, and all that will occur. It was like I had no sense of self, that I was everything and everything was me, including God." - JoAnn M's NDE's_nde.htm

"I was one with the world I knew everything I felt everything I was here and there it was as though as I one with the whole universe," - Mani O's NDE,'s_nde.htm

The Holographic Universe (online essay):

Develop the habit of being relaxed

Control means the ability to start or stop something at will. Balance observing emotions, letting them out, exploring them with self-analysis on the one hand with, on the other hand, focusing your mind on something else and trying to relax the emotions away.

Michael you did not mention materialism or individualism. Those two ideologies appear to be major causes of stress, anxiety and often, eventual unhappiness in our society. We still have a system of beliefs that tells us that material things bring us happiness and we Americans pride ourselves on our individualism.

Would like to state that in my life I was able to avoid these two traps but been there done that. But the good news is we often learn from our failures, sometimes we learn more from our failures than our successes. Many years ago an expensive foreign sports car passed me on the freeway and his license plate read "I did ok" and I thought to myself “that very small statement pretty much sums up much of American mentality”.

As far as love it is the one term that cross validates across the board in my research into the mysteries of life as the "secret" to joy and peace of mind. Again I ask if we were created with perfect love and intelligence how would this oneness manifest itself, experience itself, share itself, and create this eternal drama we call life.

Ignorance appears to be a necessary factor for the creation of unique identities. Now why was the Buddha unable to figure out the necessity of ignorance for him to exist as a unique personality?

Interesting ideas about stress, but I do not buy into the idea that there is any solid form of reality to connect with, beyond what some people band together to create... outside of this planet and its people I feel the universe as being infinite and vast beyond all the comprehension my current condition can muster.

Second, while there are people who may be able to use your advice in terms of positivity, for some of us it is more a matter of brain disfunction than willfull malice. Being bi-polar and having a severe anxiety disorder, I can tell you that no amount of personal effort can withstand the spike of rage that comes with the manic condition, nor overcome the intense fear that comes forth when under the weight of a depressive condition. I may have perfect understanding as a soul, but everything here is filtered through the physical brain - so it is not always that simple to overcome rage with love.

>Being bi-polar and having a severe anxiety disorder,

If you have a medical condition, then my advice will probably not be of much value. But in some cases, cognitive therapy can change the patterns of activity observed in the brain. So possibly some mental "retraining" would be of use to you, though I imagine it would have to be augmented by the right medications.

Anyway, I was thinking more of everyday stress than of serious anxiety disorders.

Hey Michael, yes I realize that. I wrote my message waaaaay too early in the morning. As such I took it a bit too personally. Being a bit more clear headed now I do agree with many of your points, particularly that the origin of stress lies within anger and fear.

You are right about medications and therapy by the way, without them I would most certainly be dead by now. Unfortunately in my case the treatments are not enough to allow a fully normal life. But normal is over-rated anyway :)

Consider that anger/fear is sometimes necessary for survival. You may be connected to everything but sometimes you should take a moment to consider wheter anger or fear is the appropriate response, then act.

Art's post says something I never thought of. Are we here to learn how to be _less_ than one with the universe?

The only way you can discover authentic emotions is to feel them, not to think about them. Thoughts are very different from feelings. Thoughts keep you in AM frequencies, feelings take you into FM and beyond.

People usually confuses thoughts, emotions and conditioned responses all messed up together. Road rage is not anger, it is a thought process which results from not feeling your emotions in the first place. You are really anger at someone you care about who has hurt you, not a stranger in a car.

I agree with some of the other comments posted, all authentic emotions are necessary for survival. That is the reason we have them. For example, fear keeps you safe. Anxiety on the other hand is maladaptive and like static on the radio. If you want to improve your emotional health I suggest you get clear about the difference between your thoughts, which are like road rage and your authentic feelings such as fear.

Feeling emotions makes you highly effective, creative and emotionally intelligent. People who feel their feelings do not act them out on others.


I think I agree with you for the most part, but I'm not sure it is anger that I am experiencing when I encounter inconsiderate people on a daily basis. It's more a matter of being upset that people are so inconsiderate and unconscious of others.

As an example, I was in the grocery store yesterday and about to pick up a hand basket. The woman in front of me was also getting a basket as she talked on her cell phone. She stopped with her hand on the pile of baskets while she conversed, seemingly unaware that someone was behind her waiting to pick up a basket. I had plenty of time, but it simply upset me that the woman was so unconscious. I wouldn't call it anger. If there was fear there, it was fear that this type of self-absorbtion and lack of consideration is in conflict with spirituality. Perhaps a shrink could dig deeper into my psyche and find anger there, but then we get into a semantical issue.

Next to baggage "buttheads" (Is that an anger word?) on the airlines, i.e., people carrying oversize bags on the plane to save time and thereby inconveniencing others, people using cell phones while driving and while shopping are major irritants for me.

Art's post says something I never thought of. Are we here to learn how to be _less_ than one with the universe? - MarkL

We are here in the physical universe for three simple reasons. #1. To become separate, unique, individuals, and we do that by experiencing duality and separation. #2. To experience time and space, and we accomplish that simply by being living in a 3D + 1T universe. #3. Encode memory engrams of the parameters of a physical body which we do by simply inhabiting a physical body. Stub your toe, scratch an itch, hit your funny bone, paper cuts, brush your hair or your teeth, everything we experience in our bodies (even toothaches) teaches the soul what "out there" looks and feels like. Like the way a sculptor chisels a statue out of marble. Why? Because heaven is the world of the imaginal, a place where thoughts are things and consciousness creates reality. We'll use the memories we've gathered while we are alive to create our own reality after we cross over. "As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he." Not only that, but due to the holographic nature of the other side, all the information, memories, feelings, and emotions that we've learned while alive will or can be shared with everyone on the other side. Separation is a here thing, and not a there thing. Life's lessons are embedded in our everyday lives. We learn holistically what it is we are supposed to learn. We don't have to do anything. Everyone learns what it is they are supposed to learn. I don't believe we are here to learn how to love or become one with God. If that were true than the Universe is very poorly designed, but if we are here to learn about what it means and how it feels to be alive, space and time, and become separate, unique, individuals, than the Universe is very cleverly designed. Resistance is futile, you will be unassimilated. Belief is irrelevant, acceptance is irrelevant, agreement is irrelevant. The game is rigged and everyone wins in the end. This comes from reading tons of books about near death experiences, quantum physics, and the holographic universe. The answers to lifes most perplexing questions lie in NDE's and the holographic nature of the universe.

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